Treasures

Some works that have been important to me.

Fiction

A picture of the cover of the book
This “ambiguous utopia” with its flawed but beautiful anarchist society has been an inexhaustible font of inspiration, courage, and optimism for me. The world would be a better place if more people read this book.

He asked his students to write a paper on any problem in physics that interested them, and told them that he would give them all the highest mark, so that the bureaucrats would have something to write on their forms and lists. To his surprise a good many students came to him to complain. They wanted him to set the problems, to ask the right questions; they did not want to think about questions, but to write down the answers they had learned. And some of them objected strongly to his giving everyone the same mark. How could the diligent students be distinguished from the dull ones? What was the good in working hard? If no competitive distinctions were to be made, one might as well do nothing.

“Well, of course,” Shevek said, troubled. “If you do not want to do the work, you should not do it.”

Surely freedom lay rather in openness than in secrecy, and freedom is always worth the risk.

“But what,” Oiie said abruptly, as if the question, long kept back, burst from him under pressure, “what keeps people in order? Why don’t they rob and murder each other?”

“Nobody owns anything to rob. If you want things you take them from the depository. As for violence, well, I don’t know, Oiie; would you murder me, ordinarily? And if you felt like it, would a law against it stop you? Coercion is the least efficient means of obtaining order.”

We know that there is no help for us but from one another, that no hand will save us if we do not reach out our hand. And the hand that you reach out is empty, as mine is. You have nothing. You possess nothing. You own nothing. You are free. All you have is what you are, and what you give.

A picture of the cover of the book
Before this book, I had never entered a flow state through reading fiction. I did not expect to empathise with and admire Christian characters so deeply either. Nor could I know how timely a book from pre-revolutionary Russia would feel. Also, it’s a murder mystery? This is easily the most powerful book I know.

I would only ask the reader not to be in too great a hurry to laugh at my young man’s pure heart. Not only have I no intention of apologizing for him, of excusing and justifying his simple faith on account of his youth, for instance, or the little progress he had made formerly in the study of science, and so on and so forth, but I will do the opposite and declare firmly that I sincerely respect the nature of his heart. No doubt some other young man, who takes his heart’s impressions more prudently, who has already learned how to love not ardently but just lukewarmly, whose thoughts, though correct, are too reasonable (and therefore cheap) for his age, such a young man, I say, would avoid what happened to my young man, but in certain cases, really, it is more honorable to yield to some passion, however unwise, if it springs from great love, than not to yield to it at all.

We are assured that the world is becoming more and more united, is being formed into brotherly communion, by the shortening of distance, by the transmitting thoughts through the air. Alas, do not believe in such a union of people. Taking freedom to mean the increase and prompt satisfaction of needs, they distort their own nature, for they generate many meaningless and foolish desires, habits, and the most absurd fancies in themselves. They live only for mutual envy, for pleasure-seeking and self-display. To have dinners, horses, carriages, rank, and slaves to serve them is now considered such a necessity that or the sake of it, to satisfy it, they will sacrifice life, honor, the love of mankind, and will even kill themselves if they are unable to satisfy it.

My young brother asked forgiveness of the birds: it seems senseless, yet it is right, for all is like an ocean, all flows and connects; touch it in one place and it echoes at the other end of the world. Let it be madness to ask forgiveness of the birds, still it would be easier for the birds, and for a child, and for any animal near you, if you yourself were more gracious than you are now, if only by a drop, still it would be easier. All is like an ocean, I say to you. Tormented by universal love, you, too, would then start praying to the birds, as if in a sort of ecstasy, and entreat them to forgive you your sin. Cherish this ecstasy, however senseless it may seem to people.

The centripetal force on our planet is still fearfully strong, Alyosha. I have a longing for life, and I go on living in spite of logic. Though I may not believe in the order of the universe, yet I love the sticky little leaves as they open in spring. I love the blue sky, I love some people, whom one loves you know sometimes without knowing why. I love some great deeds done by men, though I’ve long ceased perhaps to have faith in them, yet from old habit one’s heart prizes them.

A picture of the cover of the book
I read this book at just the right point in my life: I was slowly leaving the bubble in which rational-minded programmers are better at everything than everyone else really; and Walkaway completely shattered that bubble in the best possible way. Many of the computer sciency things I do today are still informed by this book. It has its weaknesses, but as long as people praise meritocracy with a straight face, it deserves being read more widely.

We’re not making a world without greed, Jacob. We’re making a world where greed is a perversion. Where grabbing everything for yourself instead of sharing is like smearing yourself with shit: gross. Wrong. Our winning doesn’t mean you don’t get to be greedy. It means people will be ashamed for you, will pity you and want to distance themselves from you. You can be as greedy as you want, but no one will admire you for it.

Look, there are as many walkaway philosophies as there are walkaways, but mine is, ‘the stories you tell come true.’ If you believe everyone is untrustworthy, you’ll build that into your systems so that even the best people have to act like the worst people to get anything done. If you assume people are okay, you live a much happier life.

Once you’ve been a shotgun person for a while, it’s hard to imagine anything else, and you start using stupid terms like ‘human nature’ to describe it. If being a selfish, untrusting asshole is human nature, then how do we form friendships? Where do families come from?

Your dad manages to kid himself that he’s rich and powerful because he’s the cream and has risen to the top. But he’s not stupid. He knows he’s kidding himself. So underneath that top layer of bullshit is another, more aware belief system: the belief that everyone else would kid themselves the same way he does, if they had the chance.

A picture of the cover of the book
As far as first works to encounter that criticise religion go, this is an amazing one. Of all the fantasy books I devoured as a young teenager, this trilogy alone stayed with me.
A picture of the cover of the book
A chilling play about a soldier returning from the war that deeply impressed me toward the end of school. Can we not do wars, please?
A picture of the cover of the book
Books can be weird!
A picture of the cover of the first book
Stories can be expansive.

Non-Fiction

A picture of the cover of the book
A compelling exploration of why most of everything feels pretty fucked up nowadays, and how things might, in principle, be changed for the better. Slightly uncomfortable at times, but all the more impressive for following a passionate, humanistic logic through that discomfort. Also, I love that I found a book which perfectly captures (and helped me clarify to myself) why I have always tried to keep smartphones out of my life — and that said book was published decades before the first smartphones existed.

Education, the mails, social work, transportation, and even civil engineering have followed this evolution. At first, new knowledge is applied to the solution of a clearly stated problem and scientific measuring sticks are applied to account for the new efficiency. But at a second point, the progress demonstrated in a previous achievement is used as a rationale for the exploitation of society as a whole in the service of a value which is determined and constantly revised by an element of society, by one of its self-certifying professional élites.

People have a native capacity for healing, consoling, moving, learning, building their houses, and burying their dead. Each of these capacities meets a need. The means for the satisfaction of these needs are abundant so long as they depend primarily on what people can do for themselves, with only marginal dependence on commodities. These activities have use-value without having been given exchange-value. Their exercise at the service of man is not considered labor.

These basic satisfactions become scarce when the social environment is transformed in such a manner that basic needs can no longer be met by abundant competence. The establishment of radical monopoly happens when people give up their native ability to do what they can do for themselves and for each other, in exchange for something “better” that can be done for them only by a major tool.

When ends become subservient to the tools chosen for their sake, the user first feels frustration and finally either abstains from their use or goes mad.

Growth has become addictive. Like heroin addiction, the habit distorts basic value judgments. Addicts of any kind are willing to pay increasing amounts for declining satisfactions. They have become tolerant to escalating marginal disutility. They are blind to deeper frustration because they are absorbed in playing for always mounting stakes. Minds accustomed to thinking that transportation ought to provide speedy motion rather than reduction of the time and effort spent moving are boggled by this contrary hypothesis.

A picture of the cover of the book
The one book that every (computer) scientist should read.

“The scientific man has above all things to strive at self-elimination in his judgements,” wrote Karl Pearson in 1892. Of the many scientists I know, only a very few would disagree with that statement. Yet it must be acknowledged that it urges man to strive to become a disembodied intelligence, to himself become an instrument, a machine. So far has man’s initially so innocent liaison with prostheses and pointer readings brought him. And upon a culture so fashioned burst the computer.

Power is nothing if it is not the power to choose. Instrumental reasoning can make decisions, but there is all the difference between deciding and choosing.

Horkeimer, long before computers became a fetish and gave concrete form to the eclipse of reason, gave us the needed perspective:

“Justice, equality, happiness, tolerance, all the concepts that ... were in preceding centuries supposed to be inherent in or sanctioned by reason, have lost their intellectual roots. They are still aims and ends, but there is no rational agency authorized to appraise and link them to an objective reality. Endorsed by venerable historical documents, they may still enjoy a certain prestige, and some are contained in the supreme law of the greatest countries. Nevertheless, they lack any confirmation by reason in its modern sense. Who can say that any one of these ideals is more closely related to truth than its opposite? According to the philosophy of the average modern intellectual, there is only one authority, namely, science, conceived as the classification of facts and the calculation of probabilities. The statement that justice and freedom are better in themselves than injustice and oppression is scientifically unverifiable and useless. It has come to sound as meaningless in itself as would the statement that red is more beautiful than blue, or that an egg is better than milk.” [M. Horkeimer, Eclipse of Reason, 1947]

It may be that social services such as welfare could have been administered by humans exercising human judgment if the dispensing of such services were organized around decentralized, indigenous population groupings, such as neighborhoods and natural regions. But the computer was used to automate the administration of social services and to centralize it along established political lines. If the computer had not facilitated the perpetuation and “improvement” of existing welfare distribution systems — hence of their philosophical rationales — perhaps someone might have thought of eliminating much of the need for welfare by, for example, introducing negative income tax. The very erection of an enormously large and complex computer based welfare administration apparatus, however, created an interest in its maintenance and therefore in the perpetuation of the welfare system itself. And such interests soon become substantial barriers to innovation even if good reasons to innovate later accumulate. In other words, many of the problems of growth and complexity that pressed insistently and irresistibly for response during the postwar decades could have served as incentives for social and political innovation. An enormous acceleration of social invention, had it begun then, would now seem to us as natural a consequence of man’s predicament in that time as does the flood of technological invention and innovation that was actually stimulated.

It is a widely held but a grievously mistaken belief that civil courage finds exercise only in the context of world-shaking events. To the contrary, its most arduous exercise is often in those small contexts in which the challenge is to overcome the fears induced by petty concerns over career, over our relationships to those who appear to have power over us, over whatever may disturb the tranquil- ity of our mundane existence.

If this book is to be seen as advocating anything, then let it be a call to this simple kind of courage.

A picture of the cover of the book
The other one book that every (computer) scientist should read. Whereas Weizenbaum calls out societal harm caused by unreflecting technologists, Papert offers an empowering vision of how computers could enrich society’s capability for reflection and epistemology.

In many schools today, the phrase “computer-aided instruction” means making the computer teach the child. One might say the computer is being used to program the child. In my vision, the child programs the computer and, in doing so, both acquires a sense of mastery over a piece of the most modern and powerful technology and establishes an intimate contact with some of the deepest ideas from science, from mathematics, and from the art of intellectual model building.

By deliberately learning to imitate mechanical thinking, the learner becomes able to articulate what mechanical thinking is and what it is not. The exercise can lead to greater confidence about the ability to choose a cognitive style that suits the problem. Analysis of “mechanical thinking” and how it is different from other kinds and practice with problem analysis can result in a new degree of intellectual sophistication. By providing a very concrete, down-to-earth model of a particular style of thinking, work with the computer can make it easier to understand that there is such a thing as a “style of thinking.” And giving children the opportunity to choose one style or another provides an opportunity to develop the skill necessary to choose between styles. Thus instead of inducing mechanical thinking, contact with computers could turn out to be the best conceivable antidote to it. And for me what is most important in this is that through these experiences these children would be serving their apprenticeships as epistemologists, that is to say learning to think articulately about thinking.

Juggling and writing an essay seem to have little in common if one looks at the product. But the processes of learning both skills have much in common. By creating an intellectual environment in which the emphasis is on process we give people with different skills and interests something to talk about. By developing expressive languages for talking about process and by recasting old knowledge in these new languages we can hope to make transparent the barriers separating disciplines. In the schools math is math and history is history and juggling is outside the intellectual pale. Time will tell whether schools can adapt themselves. What is more important is understanding the recasting of knowledge into new forms.

A child (and, indeed, perhaps most adults) lives in a world in which everything is only partially understood: well enough perhaps, but never completely. For many, understanding the Turtle’s action so completely that there is nothing more to say about it is a rare, possibly unique, experience. For some it is an exhilarating one: We can see this by the children’s eagerness to explain what they have understood. For all it is a better model of the crispness of analytic knowledge than most people ever encounter.

A picture of the cover of the book
Having been trained as a computer engineer to see complexity and inefficiency as purely negative, this book helped me to see their benefits as well. Which, given that the world is full of (superficial) inefficiencies, greatly improved my peace of mind.
A picture of the cover of the book
A hopeful reminder that financial realities can and have shifted a great deal over time. Also a fascinating collection of not-quite-general knowledge on what humans have been up to over the last millenia.
A figure from the essay
I recommend this short essay to anyone who struggles to understand how some people can find fulfilment in mathematics. And to anyone who does find fulfilment in mathematics but struggles to communicate why.

Digital

A still from the presentation
Bret Victor has been my most direct source of inspiration and endurance as well as self-doubt and depression with respect to working with computers. Anyone willing to reflect on the practice of programming probably benefits from absorbing his output.
A screenshot of the workstation of BeepBox
When my chronic wrist pain was at its worst, this website was my primary way of making music. I don’t want to know how badly I’d have done during that time without this gem.
Hermies, the hermit crab logo of secure scuttlebutt, scuttling along
Zach beautifully captured the optimism some dozens of us nerds used to share on Secure Scuttlebutt. The community has drifted apart, but for me, the wonder will always stay.
The title splash image of the article
Cade beautifully tore apart the optimism we shared on Secure Scuttlebutt. Being called out in this essay strongly affected how I try to approach systems design now.
A screenshot of this article about football
The best article about American football I ever read. Also the only article about American football I ever read. Something is terribly wrong.

Music

This section was difficult to narrow down. I’m going with a chronologically sorted selection of works or performances, each of which has shaped different parts of my musical understanding. And I’m omitting a painful amount of fantastic music...

First page of the autograph
When I learned about double stops on the violin, I asked my dad whether it wouldn’t then be possible to write polyphonic music for the violin. He showed me the fugue from this sonata in response, which has stayed with me since that day.
First page of the first movement
Far from the first piano piece I fell in love with, but I adore how so much beauty comes from such relative simplicity.
A picture of Mendelssohn
I was immensely lucky to go to a school whose choir performed larger pieces such as this one. The intense joy of singing in a group does not compare to anything else.
A picture of Shostakovich
To me, the passacaglia is the most beautiful thing ever created by a human being. That is all.
The album cover
I grew up almost exclusively listening to classical music. The raw intensity of music such as this album makes me glad I eventually explored beyond that.
The album cover
Early after branching out of purely classical music into more popular stuff, I got stuck in a spiral of increasingly chaotic, intellectual, and frankly ugly music (John Zorn can lead down a slippery slope). Joni’s music broke me out of that.
The album cover
Listening to this record at the age of thirteen turned music from something that was always just there into something magnificent and painful and wonderous and overwhelming.
The album cover
While I do enjoy jazz music, quite a lot of jazz sounds like quite a lot of other jazz from a certain distance. But then there are musicians like John Lurie.
A poster for the concert
The first bit of music I heard by Sonic Youth. I clearly recall feeling completely stunned by the opening track, as if I had never properly heard guitars before.
The album cover
When I first listened to this album, I did not like it. But I sensed that I could like it. So I listened to it again, and again, and again. And at some point, it had become my favourite piece of recorded music.
A fotograph of Merrill Garbus during the concert
I greatly admire when anyone can channel and shape energy like this. I do not dance, but if I did, it would be to music such as this.
A fotograph of the band during the concert
I have always considered bands as a continuation of the tradition of classical chamber music. The Punch Brothers make some of my favourite contemporary chamber music.

Other

Turns out a far-reaching abscence of pleasant anticipation or joy over several years does not mean you are an ungrateful failure, and admits effective treatment. Going into therapy was an almost impossibly difficult step, but also the best decision of my life.
A painting by Hundertwasser: 'Die Häuser hängen unter den Wiesen'

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